


Cycle of Us

by kangseungyoonscap



Category: Winner (Band)
Genre: (also--some swearing), 2Seung if you squint, Alternate Universe - College/University, Attempt at Humor, Jinwoo is Whipped, M/M, So is Mino, Some Plot, SongKim, mentions of nightmares and insomnia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-28
Updated: 2019-07-28
Packaged: 2020-07-23 23:40:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20016685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kangseungyoonscap/pseuds/kangseungyoonscap
Summary: Jinwoo says he is not smitten and Mino says he doesn't want to be in a relationship, but their actions show otherwise.





	Cycle of Us

Jinwoo wakes up alone in the bed, his eyes fluttering awake.

He sits up, the white sheets falling at his waist, exposing his naked torso. But the sudden movement only made him dizzy. "Shit," He grumbles as he massages his temples.

He usually can drink a lot, but he must've drunk a shit ton of alcohol earlier if he feels this awful. Being in this state makes him regret his life choices, now more than ever. "I'm never drinking again. Ever."

When his eyes finally adjusted to the dark, he looks around and slowly takes in his surroundings.

It's quiet and only the moonlight coming in through the sliding glass doors illuminate the room. Numerous clothes, including his own, were strewn along the floor along with some drawings and unfinished canvases, gray walls exhibit paintings, and a collection of expensive cameras rest on a shelf at the far corner of the room.

This is definitely not Jinwoo's room, but he knows whose messy room is this.

Song Mino's. That sexy fucker.

The thought makes Jinwoo let out a satisfied smirk. So, they ended up at his place then. _Again_.

The clock hanging near the top of the large empty frame that reads: 2:15 am makes Jinwoo sigh. Too early and too late to go back to his own apartment.

.

It was supposed to be a one-time thing only.

It started that one Tuesday night and for different reasons, they were in the same place at the same time.

Jinwoo sat alone in a booth at a bar near their university. A scowl formed on his face as he read the text from a guy named Song Ki Joong, his supposed-to-be date for that night, that he can't go because he is 'not feeling well'. Jinwoo scoffs at his phone. Can't the guy think of a better excuse? Like his cat is dying or something?

Jinwoo can't believe it. He just got stood up and for a very lame reason too. No one has stood him up before and his ego was hurt.

If only his best friend didn't force him to go on this stupid date, then he wouldn't have wasted his time getting ready only to get stood up by this jerk when he could've been doing better things right now other than sulking at a bar, _alone_ , on a school night.

Out of annoyance, he deleted the messages and even the number of the Ki Joong guy. It's petty, yes, but he is pissed.

Pissed at the guy and pissed at his best friend. Scratch that, Jinwoo is demoting him into _just a friend._

"You." Jinwoo said furiously on the phone, when Seunghoon, his demoted best friend slash the one who forced him on this date, finally answered his call.

"What? You got stood up?" The guy jokingly guessed, having no idea that he was right. Jinwoo took a deep breath in a poor effort to not yell at the annoying ass on the other end of the line. "Yes, I did."

"Seriously?" Then an obnoxious laugh followed. "Oh my god, this is amazing! Guess when you don't have a face like mine then you'll eventually get dumped."

"First," Jinwoo gritted his teeth. "I did not get dumped. The jerk stood me up. There's a difference. And second, this is your fault. You forced me to go on this date. Now my Tuesday night is ruined."

"I'm sorry, okay?" But Seunghoon doesn't sound even a little bit apologetic, instead, he sounded amused at Jinwoo's current status. "Why don't you just hang out there for a little bit? Drink some beer. Maybe find some cutie that will make you forget your supposed-to-be date and will make you hot and sweaty all night?" And Jinwoo can imagine Seunghoon wiggling his eyebrows at the lewd suggestion.

"I'm not like you, Seunghoon. I told you I don’t mess around and have one-night stands almost on a daily basis."

"Hey, I am a changed man now, you know. I have set my sights on one man and it's Seungyoon and him alone." Seunghoon explains. Jinwoo thinks that whoever that Seungyoon guy is- he wished him luck. A bad entity just decided to stalk him around. "And why not? One-night stands are fun. 'Bye-bye, thank you for the nice fuck. See you never again.' No strings attached. It's ideal."

"No, it is not. It's exhausting. And uncertain. And makes me insecure." Jinwoo pinches the bridge of his nose. This is stressing him out and somehow, talking to Seunghoon only stresses him out more.

Thankfully, his friend dropped the subject. "Yeah, okay, fine. You know what? Just forget about the guy. To be honest, I don't even know who that King Koong guy is-"

"Ji Koong," Jinwoo calmly corrected but his tone quickly changed into anger when he finally realized what Seunghoon said. "You mean to say, you made your _best friend_ go on a date with someone you don't even know? Are you trying to get me a boyfriend or are you trying to get me murdered, Lee Seunghoon?"

"I'm trying to get you get laid, Mr. Kim Jinwoo, if that isn’t obvious. But if you end up having a boyfriend as well, that's even better. I'm such a good wingman and best friend, I know, right? I'm expecting my free coffee for the next two weeks." Seunghoon ranted on. And Jinwoo just palmed his face out of frustration because: Seunghoon.

"Besides, I know a friend who is friends with his friend. Chill, dude. I was told he's a nice guy."

Jinwoo just groans, deciding that their talk is going nowhere. "Ugh, I hope you and that Ki Joong steps on a lego. I'm hanging up. Bye."

He looks around the bar. There's not much people around since it is a weeknight. Only a small group of people in the corner and a lone guy seated by the counter.

Might as well go grab a drink before he calls it a night.

Jinwoo ordered a beer and sat down, one seat away from the man who looks like a college student as well. He was halfway through his drink when the stranger spoke up.

"Date stood you up?"

Jinwoo eyed him cautiously, "Yeah."

He subtly eyed the man up and down, taking in his appearance. Boots. Ripped jeans. Bomber jacket and a statement tee. And wow, he looks so damn good, too. And his mussed-up hair only made him more attractive. Must be from the Music department.

"Art department, actually." The stranger spoke up again and Jinwoo raised his eyebrow at him. "I heard you whisper it."

"What?"

"That I'm from the music department. I'm not."

"Oh, sorry." Jinwoo awkwardly laughed.

"You're not entirely wrong, though. Music is my thing too, but art is officially my program." The stranger grinned at him and Jinwoo froze for a good three seconds because goddammit, not only does this stranger look good but he is gorgeous as fuck too when he smiles.

Jinwoo thinks he might have a crush.

"My name is Song Mino, by the way." The stranger- whose name is Mino- held out his hand at him.

Jinwoo took his hand and shook it. "Kim Jinwoo. From liberal studies department." Mino’s hands were big. And warm. And fits perfectly against his own. Jinwoo felt a blush creeping to his cheeks so he immediately diverted his thoughts elsewhere. "And you? What brought you here on a school night?"

"Just relieving some stress," Mino sipped a drink from his bottle before continuing. "And date problems, too."

Jinwoo glances at him, intrigued at his new _acquaintance_. "Did you get stood up too?" He inquires in a light hearted manner, not wanting to probe further in case the guy is not comfortable with him yet.

Much to his pleasant surprise, Mino laughed. And damn, his laugh is really attractive too.

"No. I stood _him_ up."

"Oh. So, you stood someone up while I got stood up." Jinwoo shook his head, no longer pissed at what happened earlier. In fact, he feels somewhat glad that he got stood up by his date and Mino ditched his.

"It's her loss, you know. She passed up the chance to meet someone attractive like you." Did he heard it right? Did this guy just flirted with him? Or was that an actual compliment from the stranger? 

"His," Jinwoo corrected. Mino shot him a questioning look. "His loss. You know, my supposed-to-be-date tonight."

Mino let out an amused ‘oh’ and drank his beer. But Jinwoo was pretty sure he saw a smirk form on his lips.

Four bottles of beer later, they are now sat side by side. Both already tipsy as they chuckle at whatever each other is saying. But all Jinwoo can think about is how Mino looks so attractive. How he licks his lips, in an almost seductive way that makes Jinwoo's throat go dry, and how Mino's gaze flicked from his eyes down to lips, and how Mino's stare makes him feel hot all over.

And Mino must be thinking the same because the next thing Jinwoo knows, Mino is hovering over his lips.

"I don't do one-night stands." Jinwoo warned, his eyes trained on Mino's.

"Me neither," The guy smirked. "Let's make this night an exception." And Jinwoo groaned inwardly, his mind already waving red flags at him, that this might be a mistake and he might regret what he's about to do, but damn, Mino looks so good and Jinwoo can no longer think straight.

So, Jinwoo closed the gap and kissed Mino. Tentatively. Softly at first. Until it grew passionately.

Jinwoo must be drunk. Definitely drunk. And definitely not just by beer but by this stranger's kisses too.

Mino tasted of beer and cigarettes. And mint. And Jinwoo is definitely intoxicated by him.

"Let's get out of here." Mino whispered right beside his ear, when they broke apart gasping for air. And Jinwoo nodded. _Yes_.

He can't believe that for once, he's actually following Seunghoon's advice.

It was supposed to be one night only.

But after bumping with each other on several occasions off campus, the tension between them only grew stronger and they eventually ended up on each other's bed. Again. Multiple times.

The attraction between them is obvious and they simply couldn't get enough of each other.

But what they have... Is not a conventional relationship.

They aren't exactly friends. Sure, they hang-out and stuff. But what they do is _definitely not_ what friends do. And it confuses Jinwoo at times because what is he really in Mino's life? An acquaintance? A friend? Fuck buddy? He doesn’t know.

 _‘It's like a cycle. A routine.’_ Jinwoo thought one night as he watched Mino’s naked back while the latter is busy painting.

Mino is a second year and majors in painting, while Jinwoo is already in his fourth year in liberal studies. Even though their college buildings are practically next to each other, they rarely bump into each other in the campus.

So, twice or thrice a week, Mino calls him to meet up, either in a bar or a club. Talk a little bit, get drunk, dance a little bit, and then fuck. It was only a matter of whose place are they going to end up at the end of the night. And in the morning, if one of them didn't leave yet, they make breakfast and eat together. Simple as that- only it is not.

It sounds pretty domestic, yes, and one would think that they are already in a relationship but they are not. Much to Jinwoo's dismay.

It is a cycle he wanted to break but he can't. Because it's the only way he can be with Mino.

.

The buzzing sore Jinwoo's starting to feel in his lower body seems enough proof that they had an exhaustingly good time a few hours ago. He can only assume since he was really drunk and all he remembers is them on a crowded dance floor and strong, large hands gripping his waist.

Where the hell is Mino, anyway? Did he go somewhere? In the middle of the night?

Jinwoo stands up, wincing from the pain shooting throughout his body. He feels sticky and sweaty, and there is no way he's going back to bed while in this disgusting state. As he is slipping his boxers on, he notices the two painkillers and a glass of water resting on top of the bedside table.

'At least, he cares.' Jinwoo thinks and smiles warmly at the things

He just finished drinking the medicine when the door suddenly creaks open, revealing half-naked Mino, making him choke madly on the water. Damn this water.

“Hyung! Are you okay?”

"What the fuck, Mino." He puts a hand on his chest when he finally stopped coughing water out of his nose _‘gracefully_ ’. "You surprised me!"

"Sorry, hyung.” Mino smiles sheepishly at him. “You're awake already?"

"Yeah, I… wanted to take a shower. And you? Did you even sleep?"

Mino distractedly hums out a response. He walks toward the glass doors, slides it open and steps out into the small balcony.

"Mino?" Jinwoo puts on Mino's discarded shirt and follows him. "What's up?"

"Can't sleep."

Jinwoo falls silent and stretches his lips into a thin line. It's been three months since he met Mino, but he can practically read the guy by now. His eyes flickers down to Mino's hands where a pack of cigarettes and a lighter is clutched tightly.

Something is definitely up if he's about to smoke at 2 something in the morning.

But it is exactly because he knows what kind of person Mino is that he doesn't ask further. He probably doesn't want to talk about it yet. He will talk about it when he wants to, anyway. Jinwoo can wait until then.

"Just... Nightmares," Mino answers softly then adds, "And you."

"That sounded just like a title of a book or something." Jinwoo jokes. And then lightly slaps Mino's built arms when what he said finally sinks in. "So I'm a nightmare now, Song Mino? Is that it?"

Mino laughs a little again and Jinwoo’s gaze instantly softens at him.

"That seems like more of a paradise than a nightmare if I'm in it, you know.” The guy just scoffed at him as a response.

“Since when did you have nightmares?"

Mino furrows his brows. "It's been almost a month now, I think." Jinwoo gives him a worried look. He didn't even know Mino is having nightmare these days.

"Is it bad?"

Mino looks down at the cigarettes on his hands. "Not always. But there are times when there's creepy figures and then you appear-"

"Hey." Jinwoo interrupts. Slightly annoyed that he has become a nightmare for Mino.

Mino just chuckles. "No, seriously. It’s weird. I don’t know.”

A moment of silence passed before Jinwoo speaks again.

“I don't exactly know how it feels like to have nightmares but I'm pretty familiar with how being an insomniac feels." Jinwoo confesses, a timid smile plastered on his face as he runs his hands through his hair. A habit he usually does whenever he's flustered or bashful.

It was Mino’s turn to him give him a worried look.

"You know what I do when that happens?"

"Call me and asks me to come over and fuck?" Mino jokes and earns another light slap from him.

"Not that!"

"Drink soju while watching k-dramas?" Jinwoo shoots him a pointed look, but instantly grins at him, pleased that Mino know his quirks.

"It's nothing impressive. I usually can’t sleep when I overthink so I started to write. And it helped." Jinwoo looks back at Mino's impassive face. "It sounds cheesy, I know.”

Mino nudges his arms. “No, it is not, hyung. It’s interesting, to be honest. But, tell me, since when did you even start to lose sleep?"

"Two… three months ago."

"You mean when we started to..." Mino left his words hanging.

"Fuck around?” Jinwoo supplies. “Yeah, maybe. I don't know. It just happened."

"I'm sorry." Mino mumbles, somehow blaming himself for the situation Jinwoo is in.

"It’s not your fault, Mino. Everybody loses sleep once in a while. It’s no big deal." Jinwoo genuinely smiles at him. Touched by the fact that Mino is worried.

Jinwoo nibbles at his lower lip. And he doesn’t notice how Mino unconsciously swallows at the sight.

"I don't know if it's going to be the same for you, but maybe when you have nightmares and can’t go back to sleep, you could paint or draw those figures you see? Like you're facing them head-on, but through your brushes and canvases. Or, I don’t know… do something that you want? Not for some course project or exhibit. Just… whatever you want at that moment. Do anything else but think. That's what I do. I write to ease things off my mind."

“What did you write about?"

Jinwoo just shrugs and looks at Mino’s hands. "Random things," _You_ . "What I dreamt of," _About us_ . "My thoughts about something," _If you like me back_. "Whatever stuff that's on my mind."

They both fell silent. Both of them too deep in their thoughts.

This time, it was Mino who breaks the silence.

“Do you know what the strangest part in my nightmares is?” Mino breaths in slowly, contemplating what he’s about to say next. “The scary things disappear as soon as you show up. Then, I wake up. Like… Just the sight of you makes everything better, even when I’m sleeping. "

Mino lights a cigarrette and puts it in his mouth, avoiding Jinwoo’s piercing stare.

Jinwoo’s heart starts to beat rapidly and his palms start to sweat. He is stunned at the revelation of the younger man.

"I...", Jinwoo opens his mouth but realizes he doesn't know what to say after all nor what to interpret what he just heard. Is that a good thing? That he appears in Mino's nightmares? That he also makes the scary things go away in some way? Jinwoo is confused.

"What does that even mean? I don't know what to say, Mino. Do... Do you like me?"

"You know I do, hyung."

"Then be with me." Jinwoo states.

Mino shakes his head in disagreement. "We've talked about this, hyung. You know I don't want to be in a relationship."

Of course, he knows. ‘ _Then tell me, why?’_ Jinwoo wants to ask but held back as he swallows a lump that formed in his throat.

This isn't the first time that they've talked about this before but he still can't get used to this. There's still pain shooting through his chest whenever Mino subtly rejects him over and over again. Like a weight is dropped on him every time Mino emphasizes the fact that he doesn’t want to be in a relationship. Or to be with him.

As much as Jinwoo wants to stop this mess he actively chose to be part of, he can’t. And as much as he wants Mino to clearly draw the line between them, he’s also terrified of how far Mino will put his distance from him.

He’s afraid to lose Mino.

Afraid to lose the piece of him he willingly gave to Mino. Afraid to lose the man he likes way too much. So even though Mino doesn't do relationships, Jinwoo stays. And tries to understand.

Even if he is starting to feel lost with where he stands in Mino's life.

"Maybe you should consult someone? Ask for prescribed sleeping pills to help you sleep?" Jinwoo said instead, finally dropping the topic.

Mino just nods. "I will, later. We should go together though. You should get some too."

And there he goes, again. Confusing Jinwoo. Making him frustrated all the while making his heart _flutter_. One second, he's rejecting the idea of being in a relationship with Jinwoo and then the next, he asks him to come with him and pretends to care for him as if he is his boyfriend.

Song Mino. This fucker.

This is only stressing Jinwoo out.

“You are so frustrating,” he says, exasperated. Jinwoo can feel his headache coming back. “Just… give me a stick."

"I thought you are going to quit?"

Jinwoo rolls his eyes. Seriously, this man is annoying. "I will, after this one." He promises nonchalantly. They both know it’s a lie, anyway.

So Mino hands him a stick and lights it up.

After minutes of breathing in the smoke and calming down, Jinwoo speaks again. "You know you can always talk to me about stuff like these, Mino." And he means it.

He may not be Mino's boyfriend but he can, at least, consider himself as Mino's friend now.

Mino gives him an inscrutable look then smiles. "I know."

It wasn't even long when Jinwoo starts puffing on his cigarette again when Mino suddenly grabs him, one hand on his cheeks and the other on the back of his neck, and kisses him right on the lips. Hard.

Jinwoo closes his eyes as he returns the kiss just as hard. _'This will be the last time. Just this. One last. Then I’m out.'_ Jinwoo wordlessly promises. But he knows that this is a lie he's told himself multiple times just to make himself feel better.

Because just like smoking a cigarette, being with Mino is the same. Addicting. Intoxicating. Dangerous. And he will end up doing it over and over again, no matter how hard he tries to quit.

All Jinwoo can think of now are cigarettes and nightmares. And Mino.

It's a cycle Jinwoo doesn't want to break.

**Author's Note:**

> This was supposed to be a very angsty, very serious songkim one-shot, but the story somehow got longer? And this fic ended up as my lame attempt at a funny fic. I had fun writing a crackhead Seunghoon tho, even if it only was for a brief moment lol
> 
> I'm trying to improve my writing these days and I thought it'll be a lot easier to practice on something light and common. So here it is, a songkim college au.
> 
> I don't know much about how it feels like to have nightmares and what happens during one nor how to overcome it so there might be some inaccuracies. I just researched a little bit and added some stuff I already know. So, sorry if there are inaccuracies. But if ever you're having nightmares and it's getting worse, please do consult someone professional... or talk with someone you're comfortable with.
> 
> Sooo uhm did you like it? Please tell me what you think >.< I'd love to hear your thoughts and feedbacks about this chapter.
> 
> ~For my sisters, M and T. Something little to make up for my abseeeence hahaha. Ily both.


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